


Variable | Matt/Reader

by Austere_Cinere



Category: Death Note
Genre: F/M, matt and reader work with mello, realizing ur feelings broski, sorry for the lack of quality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-06
Updated: 2017-03-06
Packaged: 2018-09-28 15:50:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10130222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Austere_Cinere/pseuds/Austere_Cinere
Summary: You and Matt and a jumble of emotion that needs sorting out.





	

**Author's Note:**

> haha i made a thing

For the thousandth time you fidgeted warily and wondered how things were back home. Definitely cleaner, probably.

The dimly lit replacement base, swathed with the women that Rod Ross kept under his arm, filled with all the rest of his men – it never failed to make your skin crawl. Months and months spent as part of Mello’s team and you couldn’t get used to it. Go figure.

There were only a few things stopping you from booking it back to England, back to the safety of the library of Wammy’s.

One – the foremost – was your need for justice. That mass-murderer with a god complex, Kira? He’d murdered your idol, the man you were trained to succeed. L was gone and the world was so much bleaker and _Kira_ _was going to pay._

The other, less vengeful reason for your stay in a gritty mafia hideout were your fellow Wammy kids. You, Matt and Mello were thicker than thieves (and you _had_ ended up resorting to thievery as of late too), and you would follow them to the ends of the earth. Specifically Matt, the far more personable one.

You shifted a bit closer to the auburn-haired geek, casting wary glances at all the other guys rife with scars and scowls and a mountain of muscle. Not that they ever _treated_ you badly – after Mello had introduced you and spit a sharp threat at any who _dared_ touch you, they seemed to accept you as the younger sister-chef of sorts – but Matt’s lanky frame and good-natured apathy were far closer to home than they’d ever be.

Every time you adjusted your posture he’d flick his gaze over to you, to make sure you weren’t having a seizure, or about to cry or anything. But as kind as Matt was compared to his blond best friend, he still wasn’t _that_ kind, and only offered a slight smirk before turning back to his handheld. You resisted the urge to shove him, hopefully inconveniencing his gameplay.

“Cool it,” he mumbled around his cigarette. “We’re fine. The place isn’t going to burst into flames.”

“Like the _last_ one?” you snarked back, teeth gritted. That explosion was an absolute nightmare. You could still taste the smoke, hear the roaring flames and the yelling. That was the only time you’d ever seen Matt scared, and you vaguely wondered if he would fear for you had you almost lost your life like Mello.

You cast a glance at the short-tempered leader. He was nothing now but resentment and scar tissue, you thought sadly, peering at his ruined face. You hated to say it, but you didn’t imagine he’d ever be able to settle into a safe life.

At your earlier quip Matt chuckled, breaking you out of your reverie.

“Funny,” he commented quietly. “You should tell Mells, I bet he’d get a kick out of it.”

“If by that you mean he’d kick me into the nearest harbor, sure,” you hissed back, _notamuseddon’tsmilehe’sajerk_ at his wry humor.

“Oh, you. He could never get rid of such a cute nerd, you know that.”

The retort was accompanied by his gloved thumb brushing lightly against your jawline before returning to its place on the A button.

You bit your lip. This was one of those times when you couldn’t tell if he was serious or not. Matt wasn’t really a flirt, per se, but he did like teasing, and you never did know just how telling his little gestures were. It was infuriating.

“A cute nerd, huh? Is that why Mello hasn’t dumped you on the curb yet?”

Your comment was delivered with averted eyes and a nervous smile and Matt totally forgot for a second that he was playing through a boss battle. Ah, this was getting to be draining. Between that whole Kira thing and Mells with his mood swings and vengeful inferiority complex and this… _anomaly_ between you two, the hacker was exhausted.

Honestly, he wasn’t sure whether to take your retorts as the truth or not. From the looks of things, it seemed like you were just reflecting _his_ comments right back at him, and if he was honest he actually didn’t want that. He wanted… maybe for those scraps of affinity, of that _something_ between you, to be genuine on your part.

He licked his lips out of nervous (nervous? nah, he didn’t _get_ nervous) habit, noting that the silence between you two in that crowded room had gone on too long. There wasn’t always that tension. And that’s what it was, tension, right?

Years before this stupid mass-murder rollercoaster started he was completely comfortable with you and vice versa, and that hadn’t changed. But there was a _something_ and it bothered him and he wasn’t _supposed_ to be bothered by things. That was Mello’s job.

If he could just _define_ that variable between him and you, he’d be able to do something about it. But there wasn’t enough information, and he couldn’t give that his full attention because Kira had to be brought to justice and he was Mells’ right hand man.

“Hey, are you still there? Mattie? Earth to Matt?”

You laid a hand on his in concern and jerked back when he tensed, thinking that maybe you’d broken a boundary or something. That wasn’t right, though, you’d always had a history of occasional tactile contact. Something’d changed recently.

Forcing down your confusion and pasting a small grin on your face, you waved a hand in front of his eyes. Matt had his thinking face on, which could mean a lot of things, some good, some bad, and you could never tell which.

Looking back, you’re not quite sure _when_ exactly you became _consciously_ aware of the effect he had on you. Maybe it had been there and you were gradually becoming aware of it. Maybe it happened right then like a lightning bolt, when he sighed, pulled his goggles off and gazed straight down at you with a question on his lips. You didn’t hear the question.

Jeez, you’d known your whole life that your best friend was Matt and he had green eyes, but you’d never quite noticed how _clear_ and _stunning_ those green eyes were.

“Hm?” you mumbled dazedly, mentally shaking yourself into clarity and failing. Oh, no, help.

A second, two seconds.

And then, to add insult to injury, he threw back his head and _laughed_. A soft, startled sound full of dry mirth and self-deprecation and in that moment you had no other word with which to describe him but _beautiful_.

You fought back a flush, scowling, and he shook his head.

“Man, you’re just as clueless as I am!” he breathed, that smile still playing at his lips, right dimple still showing.

And just as startled, you laughed too, until the both of you were a mess of nerves and things-not-realized, until Mello swung his head around and glared at the two of you for having any sort of _fun_ at a time like this, until Matt was called to go handle logistics and you two reluctantly parted ways.

He decided that more than anything right then, he kind of really wanted to make you laugh like that again.

 

* * *

 

Initiative was not on Matt’s resume. He only did things when he was told to, and only then did he perform at all.

But man, lately he’d been thinking. A lot. About definitions, and labels, and cute nerd girls that were/were not just friends and _ugh_ , he was getting even less sleep than usual.

It was obvious that in terms of gestures and words, you were only going to give as much as you got.

And so he decided, the day before the next mission, that he was actually, for once, going to step it up on his own. More information meant a defined variable that he could comfortable work with and adjust and accept.

“Mello fill you in yet?” Matt drawled sleepily, tossing you a protein shake with his right hand and a handful of dry cereal into his mouth with his left. “On the mission?”

“Yeah. Not really happy with it, but I have nothing to offer, skills or better ideas, so…” you shrugged helplessly, “can’t say anything.”

You were, he knew, the most morally upright of the trio, the white to he and Mells’ respective grey and black. And that was pretty cute.

“You’ll be back quick, right?”

He stilled. You sounded so vulnerable all of a sudden, uncertain. You got like this every time he left with Mells. It was dangerous and you worried. You worried… did you worry for him specifically? His gloved hand twitched, almost for a _fraction_ of a second about to thread his fingers through yours. Why that impulse, why now? It was weird. You’d think him weird. Does not compute.

He huffed out a quiet laugh instead.

“Hey, I’m just making a distraction. It’s ridiculously easy. I’d be offended, you know, if I cared.”

You smiled slightly despite the concern on your face.

Mello had to interrupt then, wiping that tiny smile off your face. What a killjoy. Always such a killjoy.

“Matt! Hurry it up. We don’t have all day. I’ll meet you on the road.”

“Yeah, Mells,” Matt called back. The roar of Mello’s motorcycle rose to a crescendo and faded into the distance, reminding you of the gravity of your situation. You all could very well die any day.

Matt, for his part, finished lacing up his boots and drew in a breath. The way he figured, it would be about, oh, sixteen hours before he saw you again.

Letting out the air in his lungs, he took a step closer to you, and then another, until you were less than a half-inch between your chests. Bending his head, he hesitated, as if rethinking, and then pressed chapped lips against the corner of your mouth.

Sixteen hours. Plenty of time for you to mull over that.

“Hey,” he said softly, favoring you with a half-grin. “I’ll see you soon, alright?”

 

 


End file.
